Jul 30, 2012

Southport Trip

This weekend we:
forgot the double stroller...
stayed at a bed and breakfast who does not usually host children...without forwarning them..
spent $16 on 2 hotdogs..at a stand...with no chairs...

Enjoyed beautiful scenery

spent some quality mommy/daddy/kiddo time together

busted a move on the dance floor

& of course we rode the ferry numerous times...never getting off

It was a really fun weekend and we are so happy for our friends who got hitched!








Jul 27, 2012

Boogers?

Colton started complaining that his nose hurt. He complained so much that I took out the flashlight to investigate. I saw what I believed to be a booger bear in the cave and got to work trying to get it out. Nolans little green nose sucker comes in handy for all types of stuff, but mainly its a snot sucker. The boogie in question started to appear rather large. We had corn the night before so I figured great the kid stuck some corn up his nose. Then he began to whimper a little bit and his little nostril flared up! Yall I kid you not an entire peanut was stuck up his nose. For Lord knows how long...He has an itty bitty little nose too! It was gross. I got it out. He said "tank you mama no nose hurts" and went about his daily business as if nothing had happened. Yuck. Yuck. Yuckity yuck!

Were off to a friends wedding at the beach this weekend. Considering Colton hates the sand and Nolan despises the heat it seemed reasonable to bring them. Wish us luck!

Jul 25, 2012

quarter life crisis

No cute WW post today. Its my birthday. meh

In my mind I will forever be a 21 year old who still looks 18 and wayyy too young to be a wife and mother. In reality I am 25 today. I look 25. I have a mortgage and two little people who rely on me. I need to get a grip.

When did this happen? It seems like yesterday I was waking up on my best friends moms kitchen floor with a sticky bun stuck to my hair. Having only $2 in quarters to fill up my 1996 pontiac sunfires gas tank was no biggie. Time seriously flies. You fall in love with a nice guy and the next thing you know you're tripping over tricycles...

I am resolving to own this. My name is Leigh Ann and I am a 25 year old wife and mommy! I drive a kia with not only one, but two carseats and 3 strollers in the back. I am a better person now than I ever was at 18. Not only have I stopped wearing eating sticky buns, but I have accomplished more than I could have ever thought possible.

Sometimes we don't even know we want something until it's ours. Life is good and I'm grateful for the amazing 25 years I've had and am looking forward to the next 25. Also, any suggestions on anti-aging creams are welcome.

Jul 24, 2012

I don't appreciate your tone

I've been using my shouty voice a lot more than usual with the big one. I raise it up an octave when he tells me in a whisper "hush hush mommy" while I'm scooping bath toys out of the toilet. I know that I am very lucky, and have ah-mazing little boys. But man is it ever hard to get through the days with only inside voices.

Now that I'm out and about in the working world a few hours a week...I've noticed that my shouty voice has kind of carried over.  For example while waiting for my tables food to come out of the window:

(normal tone) "whats the time on my cheesesticks?" 

No response. Intentional back turn.

(Shouty voice/possible finger pointing) "Where are my cheesesticks? I've been watching you for 10 minutes mister and I know that you know I'm waiting on them!"

The difference is instead of a sweet little cherub looking back at me with an apologetic face, I get a sweaty guy telling me to "chill lady."

By far and away the worst habit I can't break in an adult setting is referring to the restroom as "the potty." Nothing ruins your street cred faster than telling your General Manager you need to go potty...



Jul 23, 2012

Back on the sauce

                       WARNING:
Someone we know has been drinking
the juice and driving


Jul 21, 2012

Fail

Colton is spending the weekend at my in-laws for the first time ever. Friday morning he was super psyched, I was super sad, Nolan was indifferent. 
We get to the arranged meeting place only to find that indeed I am a bad mom. I picked up the wrong bag. I literally sent my 2 year old on his first overnight trip 2 hours away with 3 swimmie diapers, 2 semi-clean shirts and a pair of shorts. 

facepalm of fail...

Jul 20, 2012

children learn to smile from their parents

I realized while speaking to my dad the other day that I have yet to write about members of our extended family. Since I've already mentioned him, lets talk about my daddy.
My dad is happily divorced. Twice. He is younger than all my friends dads, by about 20 years. We look alike. While at his favorite karaoke bar he got shanked (seriously). Hes addicted to sweet tea and Chus Express orange chicken. The majority of his 20's were spent on a cruise (provided by the US Navy of course). His pet hamster is named Houdini. My dad drives a motorcycle. As a teenager I remember getting cited by the city for having too many inoperable vehicles in our driveway/front yard..so he built a privacy fence in the backyard and moved them in there. 

True story:
Birds were nesting in the siding of his house, so my dad took residence on his front lawn in a folding chair while holding a very realistic looking bb gun. A police officer cruised by. Stopped. Turned around. Then proceeded to ask him wth he was doing? (after he put down the weapon of course) When he explained the bird issue he was told that hunting within city limits is illegal.




My dad no longer has birds nesting in his siding...



Jul 19, 2012

Lullaby

When Colton was an itty bitty he went through a restless stage. The only thing I could do to get him to calm down was drive him all around town. Any given day you could spot us with the windows down, my bass at full blast and some type of rap song playing. The kid LOVED the music/vibrations and a cool breeze. It was always a treat to be at a stop light in the middle of town and spot my neighbor or grandma on the side walk. This always seemed to happen when Wu-Tang Clan "Protect Your Neck" was bumping from my system in the (uh umm) Kia Sportage.


I've always liked just about any kind of music. I wasnt the biggest hardcore rap fan until Colton introduced me to the genre. That being said, if you are a fellow enthusiast, I do not recommend playing a certain N.W.A song about the police department as loud as the walls of your house can stand. Especially when your brand new neighbor is a gun toting member of said department. Yeah. That might not give a great first impression.

Jul 17, 2012

Weighing the issues

I used to be fat. Not morbidly obese fat, but chunky monkey fat. I was always a thin kid but around 8th grade I started packing on pounds and by the time I was 19 I was large and in charge. Fast Forward 4 years and a couple weight watchers meetings and you'll find me at a MUCH smaller size. I wasnt the most attractive at this size either. My head looked too big for my body.
Then I got preggers with Nolan at 24 and now I'm about 5-8 lbs away from being where I need to be. Aka not with a big head and a little body, but a thin maintainable size.

My job is helping me reach this goal in an amazingly short amount of time. You see, our a/c is useless. Its 98 degrees and humid here. If the earth had an armpit, NC would be it this time of year. I run around sweating profusely, which I'm sure is extremely appetizing looking to our patrons, for about 4-5 hours a night 4 times a week. I literally was starting to feel sick by the end of my shifts b/c of the heat and sweat. (I know this is gross). So I decided to do a little experiment. I weighed myself right before my shift and then weighed right after. I lost 3 lbs in 4 hours. No wonder I was feeling sick!

So now I have a new game plan. It involves consuming copious amounts of ice water and our walk in freezer. By the time Summer's over that freezer will not only be the coldest place in NC, but the tidiest!






Jul 16, 2012

I can't get up!!!!!










In Coltons mind he is HUGE compared to his little brother.





In reality, if he were to release him from a headlock you would see the "little" is gaining quickly on the "big".












but for now..

Jul 14, 2012

AMEN!

Five bucks on a $100 check? That's ok. We'll pray for you. While were at it, we'll say a few words for your diet coke guzzling son and his sugar packet throwing cuteness 2 yr old too.

And all of Gods peeps said.....


Jul 13, 2012

When the machines turn on us...

I'm for the most part anti-technology. This is pretty rare for someone my age and I'm sorry to be such a disgrace fellow 1987ers.  I know how to work the DVD player and text but that's about it. I don't have one of those smart phones because I've read I, Robot and and don't trust them...also I can't figure out anything that doesn't have real buttons. Touch screens bother me. We have touch screens at the restaurant I work at. You can blame them for your steamed veggies instead of the sweet potato fries. PS> Eat the darn veggies, the universe is sending you a message.


I loved my walkman. It played my Alanis Morissette "Jagged Little Pill" cassette perfectly and when it came unraveled all I needed was a pencil eraser. I was even receptive to the CD player. Hanson sounded just as good on my CD I purchased from a real store. Oddly "Mmm Bop" sounds no different when the CD is scratched...I don't have an I-pod because obviously that is wayyy above my level of touch screen ability.


DVDs ticked me off b/c my entire Disney collection is on VHS. Those scrooges at Disney created "The Vault" so that it would take me 5 years to build my collection back up to what it was...only for Blu-Ray to come around. Not only am I not supporting that btw, but I'm protesting. Its a silent protest that I do every time I go to Wal Mart and pass the electronics department. I will not yield!


We have HD TV because my husband swears up and down there's a difference between that and the regular channels were already paying for. Whatever. And whats up with the bunny ears needing a converter box? I can use the laptop to social network. I can even type 60 wpm with 3 errors or less because #1) I'm in my 20's and #2) I enjoyed AOL instant messenger as an adolescent. For blatantly obvious reasons, I cannot use an I-pad. 


So now this whole blog thing has come up and guys...its not as simple as I had assumed. Do you know what HTML format is? I mean I'm sure if you are a peer of mine you know from school what it is, but do you know how to use it? You probably do. However, me being me..I do not. My blog now has an about me tab, an awesome background (by my standards), a personalized button with personalized html stuff underneath it to share on other blogs...Holy Moly! It's 2012 folks...with this new found confidence I might even try and use the Redbox reserve feature! 

Jul 12, 2012

Jul 10, 2012

Its not broken..but here's a cast anyway

I hate adult medicine. Let me elaborate...I hate urgent care adult medicine. If you don't already know, before my exciting days as a mom/waitress extraordinaire I worked as a medical assistant in pediatrics for four years. During this time I would see countless kids with common colds (and crazy mamas) get turned away with no antibiotics because...well...they had a common cold and antibiotics weren't gonna cure it. There is a difference between viral infections and bacterial infections. 
Now, you're saying to yourself "well it can't hurt to just take the antibiotics even if they won't help...just as a precautionary measure." WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG!!!! Every time you take antibiotics when they aren’t needed or don’t complete a course of antibiotics, you help to create bacteria that are drug-resistant and spread from person to person, country to country. Way to go you anti-global citizen! :P


Recently I jumped into a cesspool of narsty mcnasty toddler carrier monkey germs. At the local Mcdonalds Playplace. Fun times. I of course am now sick with some sort of exotic disease that thrives only in areas rich with french fry oil and kids sweaty feet.  


Fast forward to me dying this morning. I sauntered into the local Urgent Care wearing my best pair of pajama pants (aka the ones with only one baby puke stain). Waited in the arctic tundra of a waiting room for an hour. Waited in the closet  room that was approximately 2 degrees hotter than the surface of the sun for another 45 minutes. But ya know whatever. I'm cool with it. Until Dr. ashnouernkjashdiygdfweknlofh, I didn't actually catch his name during his breeze by, came in.


Dr. ajalidufhijnfkjhdijhfdskjkaj: "You have kids right?" 


me: "yes..."


Dr. ajdfohdfjafhsodfjodjfiuhksj: "Ok heres your prescription for your antibiotics, do you need anything for pain?"


me: "no thanks. I don't deal drugs."


Dr. aiuhdsfjhisduijlkjaiuhkdliol: (Not shaken one bit)"Alrighty then."


The End. 


Although I could swear I heard him mutter "carrier monkeys..." as he left the room...










Jul 8, 2012

Just a typical Sunday night

It was pancake night



He got really serious after this and started doing some type of modern dance that involved high kicks and flour war paint. 


Glad you took that bath just minutes before the sacred pancake dance bud!

Jul 7, 2012

you're consuming an extraordinary amount of sweet tea sir

So I just completed my 1st week of work at a lovely steakhouse...I'm picking up a few shifts on the weekends to feel like a part of the world. Besides the fact that I have a permanent annoyed face ( this is just how my face looks) making me completely unapproachable, I feel qualified.


Be sure and stop by so I can forget to refill your sweet tea and accidentally order your steak burnt...oh and of course sit down and eat your rolls with you. Just make sure to look up the side items yourself and I only know 2 of our 18 salad dressings so if you're not partial to ranch or thousand island, sorry!  

Plus you can enjoy my lovely new scent. It tends to remind me of fat people and ranch dressing. Yummy.



We can live beside the ocean...or not..



Look at my kids on our latest beach trip. If you're wondering where this tropical paradise is, get ready for it... we went to the majestic town of Myrtle Beach, SC.

he refused to actually walk on the sand claiming it was "dirty!!" 


and this is what he did...

We went unexpectedly on a family vacation. & by "we" I mean me and the boys. Brandon had to stay behind to work. The task seemed daunting and anything but a vacation...but we went anyway. Everything was great until the last night. 

Basically we went to the classiest joint my family could come up with. aka Margaritaville. If you aren't familiar with this all American establishment allow me to give you a mental picture. Balloon artists on stilts everywhere, a loud volcano that erupts scaring young children while amusing the masses of alcohol enthusiasts, a steady stream of nothing but Jimmy Buffet songs and of course a 3 hour wait to get in the door.

I'm gonna go ahead and state for the record that I thought this was a bad idea, but without the husband around I was left with no allies and gave in to the peer pressure. The boys and I lasted about 2 hours. During that time I was able to get Colton a chicken and cheese quesadilla from another restaurant...scar him for life by subjecting him to the giant ladies, and change Nolans butt 3 times in a bathroom the size of a thimble. 

At the 2 hour mark it was anarchy. This was not a drill folks. I drove separate anticipating a possible level 10 situation...the only problem was that I'm not that great with directions. Fortunately (I guess) I didn't have to figure out the mean streets of South Myrtle Beach. While loading the screaming children a stinging bug of some sort came up and stung me directly on the nose. Yup you read that right. After enduring an evening of "amazing family fun" I got stung directly in the face. My dad later asked me what medicine I usually take when this happens. My response was a nonchalant "how often do you get stung in the freaking face?" Good times.