What I didnt know

We were the first of our immediate close friends to have a baby. Then we had another one! Every time someone announces they are expecting, I think back to my life while pregnant with Colton and those first few months as a new mom. I just *wish* I could tell myself what I know now:

1. The greatest day of your life is coming. You will have dirty hair and no make-up on. 
2. Hate to break it, you don't turn out to be one of those all belly pregnant girls.
3. Prepare thyself for the unexpected bumps in the road during pregnancy and delivery. Or at least have a bag packed by 32wks...no seriously go pack.
4. You will fall in love with your husband all over again the day your son is born.
5. Feeling like you're gonna die everyday after work is a good indicator that, indeed, you might die after work! Listen to your body chick!
6. Your family will take turns babysitting you in the hospital. Appreciate them.
7. Just because you think you know about preemie babies from work does not mean you know about YOUR preemie baby. (sidenote: calling your boss while on a pain pump & mag to tell him the nurses stole your baby is a bad idea, see #14)
8. Cloth diapers are a great investment. You rock!
9. When they tell you in the NICU to let the baby rest and quit holding him, ignore them. Cuddle on mama, cuddle on.
10. Speaking of...when wheeled into the NICU just after surgery you will insist on doing the Miss America wave the whole way. Your entire immediate family will see this. So remember elbow, elbow, wrist, wrist...
11. You will go apeshit slightly crazy when you have to leave the baby with your Gammy and go back to work. She loves that baby as much as she loves you; ALOT.
12. One day in the not so far future you get to stay home with your children. For real!
13. It's OK that he isn't even on the growth chart. He's cuter longer.
14. Do yourself a favor and have someone take your phone away from you while in the ICU. Calling your bff 4 different times to tell her you had the baby will one day be an embarrassing story.
15. Your body is never the same, its better!!!
16. You're going to love being a mommy.
17. You're never going to sleep again.
18. Just kidding...
19. But really...
20. Sleep now. Sleep for 12+ hours if you can. Then after you've been awake for a good 3 hours, lay down and take a nap. In your clean no baby puke bed! btw baby puke is gross, your babies puke is grosser. yay!!!

Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Democracy don't rule the world, You'd better get that in your head; This world is ruled by violence, But I guess that's better left unsaid.

-Bob Dylan

October is an important awareness month. We wear pink for breast cancer, we walk for our buddies with Down syndrome, and we talk about domestic violence.

Just the facts ma'am:

1. According to the CDC, domestic (or intimate partner) violence can be any physical, emotional, sexual, or psychological action that one person uses to gain power or control over another.
2. Anyone, anywhere, regardless of age, race or gender, can be affected by intimate partner violence.
3. An average of three women in America die as a result of domestic violence each day.
4. One in four women and one in thirteen men will experience domestic violence in their lifetime.
5. In the last year, one in 10 teens have reported being physically hurt on purpose by a boyfriend or girlfriend.
6. As for women in college, one in five young women have been sexually assaulted.
7. Women age 20 to 24 experience the highest rates of dating and domestic violence.

8. Females ages 16-24 are more vulnerable to intimate partner violence than any other age group.

9. Almost 70% of female rape victims were first raped before the age of 25, and over 40% were first raped before age 18.
10. Young women age 16-24 are victims of rape at almost triple the rate of women age 25-34.
The number of teens physically hurt by a dating partner has not declined between 2001 and 2011. The same is true for the number of teen victims of sexual assault.

They attack the one man with their hate and their shower of weapons. But he is like some rock which stretches into the vast sea and which, exposed to the fury of the winds and beaten against by the waves, endures all the violence.-virgil So this is the month! Go walking while wearing pink and talk about the hard stuff. Especially share some DV info with your kids, your little brother, your neighbor...whoever! Talk to change.

your words matter!

I believe that your day to day conversations are your lasting message. I talk about this IRL often with my sisters and their friends. I have zero problems talking about this with a rocket scientist should the need ever arise. Please allow me to take a moment and be a lil bit serious guys...

Imagine that you have brown eyes and the mass majority of the rest of the world have blue. You can't help that you were born with brown eyes can you? Maybe you were born with blue eyes then woke up at 12 years old and suddenly had brown? Your eyes may set you apart from the blue eyed people, but they do not make you less of a person do they? Now imagine that instead of using the word "ugly" to describe something unattractive, the blue eyed people say "that is SO brown eyes!" How would that make you feel? How would that make your blue eyed mom and dad feel? or your brothers and sisters? your friends? Anyone who believes your eyes are indeed unique and beautiful.

Now imagine that you have a subtype of intellectual disability. Lets say it's clinically diagnosed as mental retardation. You may have been born this way or maybe you sustained an injury. The mass majority of the rest of the world do not have your diagnosis. You are no less of a person because you've been diagnosed are you? Now think about how many times you or others you communicate with regularly have said "that is SO retarded!" In place of the word silly or "stupid." Get where I'm going with this? Just like it would be wrong to insinuate that someone with brown eyes is unattractive, it is wrong to insinuate that a person with a certain diagnosis is not intelligent. 

What I'm getting at is to make yourself aware. Although society does not react the same way they might if you were to use a racist slur or shout 4 letter words from the rooftops. It's still not nice and can genuinely hurt people and the ones who love them the most. Also, if you think people are just overly sensitive and trying to take away your 1st amendment rights, yada yada yada... you're not picking up what I'm throwing down here so you might wanna quit reading muh blog mmk.

I just wanted to put that one out there into the universe after hearing 3 people on 3 separate occasions this past week use the word retarded to describe something they deemed to not be working correctly or someone acting silly. So now you can't say you didnt know!

Preschool-Day 1

Colton was all set to start preschool last Wednesday. His camo book bag was stocked with baby wipes, extra clothes and his favorite toy dinosaur. Too bad on Tuesday morning he got the bubble gut pukey oh so sick virus. It was sad. Oh so sad. Poor little guy was laying in his bed hugging onto his backpack whimpering (school, big boy school...) I'm pretty sure I heard taps playing in the background.

Fast forward to Monday and hes well and ready! Well he was ready until we got to the parking lot. Then of course he changed his mind. Coltons school is really awesome. Its a local church that offers a multitude of ages and stages the preschool amazingness experience. He attended last year on Monday and Wednesday mornings for a grand total of 3 hours per day, 6 hours per week. We decided to stick with the schedule this year. No change change bad

So he did his song and dance on the way in NOOO. No schoolllll. up until we reached the classroom door where he was meet by the new teacher and appropriately changed his tune to nooo new teacher!!! Oh well. When I picked him up he was just fine and had made me not just one but TWO new pictures. It's gonna be a good year.

to remember